Me and Meg
Just in time for the holidays! Our guest writers Me and Meg take a detailed look at whether or not you are a 'Booze Bag' in this fun chart!
Me and Meg
I wanted to thank-you for putting our little angel down to bed the other night, it was really helpful. I know you probably wish you could do it every night, and clearly you need the practice. There are some things you need to remember, and somehow I’ve managed to find the time to write them down for you:
BEFORE you put a baby/toddler down to sleep at night, they need a new, DRY diaper put on them. If you do not do this, they will wake up SOAKED in urine. I am hoping because this happened to you the other night, that you will now remember this basic, fundamental rule.
Since I'm penning a lovely letter to you, I think I will just get everything off my chest. When the girls wake up in the morning, they like to eat what I call breakfast. When I come downstairs after having a RARE sleep-in, or have come upstairs from a work-out (after having done your laundry as well), I expect that they have eaten. They like to eat cereal and toast in the morning.
Lastly, I want to thank-you for sleeping through the night (at least someone in the house is sleeping through). I especially like when you wake up and say "the girls had a good night, no-one woke up". Just so you know I want to kung-fu you in the balls when you say that.
Always your loving wife,
p.s The girls have a garbage can in their bathroom, I would love it if it could be included- and emptied on garbage day.
Me and Meg
With the holiday season upon us, people’s desire to beat the line, get there first, or make sure they don’t get taken advantage of, becomes paramount. If you don’t have a Kim Kardashian size booty, you are going to feel like your personal space is being infringed upon. People seem to forget that everyone deserves personal space.
When you are a mom, a dad, or care-giver for that matter, you know very well what an intrusion of your personal space feels like. It happens daily; I’ve heard too many tales of using the washroom with an audience. This type of infringement is understandable; it goes with the territory of raising little ones. What I can not accept is when people you don’t know get in on your space.
So there I was, doing a little bit of shopping, SOLO; basking in my freedom. Here comes a space invader of a different kind, not your two-year-old hanging off your leg while you make dinner. You have most likely come into contact with this sub-species. You will be standing in a line, patiently waiting for your turn at the cash desk when someone creeps up really tight behind you. On occasion they will ask, "Are you in line?" This seems obvious to a regular person, but to a space invader you couldn't possibly be in line because you are not grazing the person's bum in front of you.
Personal space is a mystery to these people. You move an inch in line, they move two. With my space invader right up my a** and feeling his breath on the back of my neck, I did the only thing I know to do in this scenario, I put my hands on my hips with my elbows out and let my space invader bump into them a few times. With luck your space invader will be somewhat aware and will recognize the presence of your arm in their gut means they are a little too close. My new technique is going to be to turn around and ask them to brush their teeth, or perhaps I'll introduce myself and suggest they take me on a date before we round second base. Wait, I got another one, turn to them and say: “As you can see I bought these jeans to fit me, I don't know why you are trying to squeeze into them”......Wait another one: the lines not going to move any faster with you riding my a**.
My point is if you get to escape your house alone, teaching an adult the dos and don’ts of queuing and what constitutes breathing room is not something you want to spend time doing. Truth is, I’m a total pansy and would rather avoid confrontation. So I let my space invader grind up on my elbow and wait for them to tune in.
Recently, Zach Wahls, a 19-year-old University of Iowa student spoke about the strength of his family. Particularity being born and raised by lesbian mothers. During a public forum on House Joint Resolution 6 in the Iowa House of Representatives Zacks plea has gained great fame on the world-wide web.
Wahls has two mothers, and came to oppose House Joint Resolution 6 which would end civil unions in Iowa.The fight to to keep marriage equality in Iowa still continues...
Watch (below) this brave young man speak out about the comfort and privilege he has attained while living in a household with two women. His point? Family structure has no bearing on the outcome of a child.